Alex Tha Great – On Childhood Fears That May Never Go Away [Video]
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Alex tha Great, performing at WoWPS 2020 in Dallas, TX
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Transcript provided by YouTube (unedited)
on childhood fears that may never
go away when i was younger
my sisters and i would often play this
game where they would
gag me with a scarf bag me up in sheets
and lock me in a closet
until my mother got home from work
except they were only once playing
it wasn’t much of a game to me that all
about childhood memories that i feel
being terrified and them being
isn’t it some of the sickest how
people can be so overcome with joy over
your pain now the craziest thing
is that i don’t know if i’m more
embarrassed to say i’ve seen a therapist
to admit just how up i am to even
i can’t stand to be in dark places don’t
feeling like i’m not in control when i
don’t know what could be lurking out
from the shadows i’m not afraid of the
i’m afraid of what can happen in the
of the secrets that linger there of the
skeletons that will try to bury you with
them they say the misery loves company
maybe that’s why i don’t like to be
alone i sleep with the light on
in every room of my house but i can’t
stand mirrors who wants to magnify their
own flaws i have this fear talking to
don’t get too close to anyone too soon
and i swear
i’ll never say candyman in a bathroom
in the back of my mind i know i know
he’s got this hidden vendetta against me
from 20 years ago and i know
i know this got to sound crazy but
i’m not crazy just a paranoia got a way
of creeping up on you i don’t like when
people stand behind me
hands in your pockets for too long can
mean you nothing but harm and i don’t
know why sometimes i just shake
tremendously i can’t sit still i get
nervous jitters i’m always crying
i think i’m happy it’s more of a
condemnation than a declaration to me
but i’m tired y’all
tired of playing a part of the broken
girl of the shattered woman
this movie has already been cast too
many times the bitter battered angry
black as a stereotype i am now willing
to unmask i’m asking questions
i already know the answers to i’m
screaming in quiet places i’m banging on
every locked door i see i just want to
yesterday i cuddled myself in the
darkest corner of the room singing sweet
spirituals and crying shamelessly
through the night
sometimes i just need to get out of my
own head not realizing the door has
already been opened in the end
a small part of me is still just a
little girl trapped in the closet
waiting for the day that my mother
This post was previously published on YouTube.
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The post Alex Tha Great – On Childhood Fears That May Never Go Away [Video] appeared first on The Good Men Project.