How To Win in the Game of Attraction
It’s frustrating that hot women barely care about you while other guys clean up a lot. Therefore, you consider whether and how you can become more attractive as a man to have the same success in flirting and dating and to find a relationship.
It’s not a secret that everyone wants to be attractive when it comes to dating. We all have the hope that the spark will ultimately jump over and that more will come of the meeting.
Keep in mind that every girl is different. After all, if they were all alike, you wouldn’t want to attract just this one girl in particular, right? Well, just as each girl differs, there are also different ways of getting a girl to like you. But, regardless of what type of girl you want to impress and attract, there are some basic guidelines you can follow which can help your date realize that you’re a pretty good catch.
If you apply all the following tips correctly, you can end up with the sexy overall package that will make the girls melt like butter on a hot slice of toast.
By that, I mean appearance AND an attractive character play a major role because both are extremely important when getting to know women; so they should never be neglected.
First things first
Maybe you have already experienced a situation like this:
You’re at a party with friends. Suddenly you see this stunningly beautiful woman with a sweet smile and sexy charisma. You think feverishly and with a pounding heart how you can get closer to her …
… but the lady doesn’t look at you. At most, she says “hello” fleetingly, but otherwise, she hardly looks at you.
You think: “ I just don’t play in their league, I can’t keep up. I have to become more attractive to women like that first! “
But then it gets worse
Suddenly this other man stands in front of her, who you immediately dislike. He whispers something in her ear, makes her laugh, and starts to touch her. She obviously likes it. At the end of the song, this guy is kissing her and takes her home later that night.
You are humiliated, jealous, and confused. The next morning, when you wake up alone in your bed, you are still brooding over these questions:
- “ How the hell did this guy manage to seduce that woman? What did she find so interesting about him? He was quite a normal guy, and somehow an idiot too … “
- “ If there was anything about him so attractive, how can I be just as attractive as him to women? “
The brooding is over now. I’ll tell you what women really like and how you can also become more attractive to cast a spell over the hot girls!
Undoubtfully many myths are circulating in men’s magazines, books, and blogs on the Internet about what sexual attraction means. It is often said that looks are not that important.
The smart advisors want to tell you that you can look attractive just with your character. BLA BLA… Sorry, but they usually only tell you that to give you courage. Because all of these are useless if you look like Gollum from “The Lord of the Rings”.
In truth, it depends on the overall package if you want to be attractive. By that I mean having a beautiful look AND a strong character at the same time. Only then you are as unbeatable as James Bond.
Now you might say: “ But, I can’t change the way I look! “
Yes, you can!
And it’s actually pretty easy, WITHOUT having to go under the knife at the uncle doctor.
With the first few tips in this article, I’ll show you how beauty works for us men and which factors play a role in it.
1. Keep your body attractive
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No, you don’t have to become an absolute muscleman who brings home a slew of winning trophies at the bodybuilding championships. It is also the case that women are only partially into muscles and six-packs.
Nevertheless, you should pay attention to a reasonably attractive and slim figure; if only for your health.
A mixture of regular endurance sports (for example jogging, swimming or cycling) and strength training is ideal. Get advice from a trainer in advance so that you are marching in the right direction!
For more attractiveness, you should also pay attention to a healthy diet. I don’t mean senseless radical diets that make you unhappy and only lead to the yo-yo effect …
… but a permanent change in your menu, which will then help you to have a balanced diet in the future.
Find out the right information, of course, from trustworthy sources! You can find many tips and apps on the Internet that will help you achieve your goals.
2. Looking good gives you credits
Before you even go out, you have to make sure that you can be confident about the way you look in case you meet an attractive woman at your destination. If you have to make a decision between being ten minutes late for a date ‘coz you had to take a shower and arriving there on time in your work clothes, by all means, be late.
Any woman will appreciate the fact that you took the time to look handsome. When spending time with a woman, your clothes should be clean and well-pressed and you should make sure that you do not give off any unpleasant body odor. It would also help if you spent time at the gym regularly.
3. Your hairstyle matters
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Your hair isn’t there just to keep your head from freezing in winter. It should make you more attractive to women and you can achieve that with the right hairstyle.
By “suitable hairstyle” I mean a haircut that hides your unsightly areas and balances the shape of your head.
What is attractive, for example:
- If you have thinning hair and light areas, you should cut a short hairstyle or even have a bald head shaved (possibly wear fashionable hats).
- Men with long faces and high foreheads are best to wear bangs.
- And with a broad/round face, you should wear the side hair rather short and the top hair a little longer (undercut).
Otherwise, let the hairdresser you trust advise you… and then snap your hair off!
4. Find the perfect beard
I know a lot of guys who walk around with a clean-shaven milk-boy face and look like their 16-year-old little brother. Or like a much too-good son-in-law type, a mixture of Robin Williams.
Yes, women like men with beards, because the hair on your face simply makes you look more masculine. But do it without fashion sins like the 80s mustache or Santa Claus full beard if you want to be more attractive. Instead, you should get a beard that suits your fashion style and beard growth.
The beard hairstyle should be chosen in such a way that it leaves out bald areas with a lack of beard growth. If you have sparse beard growth overall, a three-day beard helps… it works as well as always!
5. Get a clean skin
We perceive people with well-cared-for skin to be particularly vital and therefore attractive. Of course, this is also attractive to women. But how do you get skin that is smooth and flawless like a child’s bottom?
Your outer beauty is not just about cleaning your face regularly. You should also get adequate sleep and avoid stress.
Drinking water a lot, along with a good diet (see above) also helps in giving your skin a fresh and young look that Justin Bieber turns green with envy!
6. Wear appropriate clothing
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A big issue. And the most common stumbling block for us men is when we want to become more attractive. The reason is that we mostly deal with more technical things and hardly care what kind of clothes are on our bodies.
It is completely different with women who browse fashion magazines from a young age and make the shopping miles in shopping centers unsafe with Daddy’s credit card!
But whining doesn’t help …
If you haven’t already done, then this is the time to start exploring fashion.
But the whole thing is also practical. Just take a look at the “cool” guys in everyday life who run through the streets with the pretty girls in their arms. Pay close attention to what kind of clothes these women heroes wear.
Otherwise, the expert advice from a fashion saleswoman you trust will help once again. And yes, you too can start reading fashion blogs and websites on the Internet where there are special tips for men!
7. Use a male body language
Anyone who walks around like the proverbial “sip of water in the curve” can never be attractive to women. Stooped gait, drooping shoulders, and corners of the mouth… none of this is particularly appealing. Especially not when flirting.
Therefore, get yourself confident body language:
- Erect posture with your back straight and your chest out
- Maintain eye contact instead of staring intimidated into the corner or at the floor
- Friendly smile (simply stunning in combination with a good sense of humor!)
- Sit slightly apart with your arms spread out, naturally without taking other people’s space or restricting them
- Calm gestures instead of hectic movements or hands in your pockets
A self-confident body language generally expresses a self-confident personality, because the body is a mirror of our soul.
8. Be an adventurer
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I don’t necessarily mean that you have to do bungee jumping or explore caves …
But most men hang out at work eight hours a day and sit in front of the tv along with a beer in the evening. You seem tired, burned out, and no longer have any real passion in life.
That is why you can become particularly attractive as a man nowadays if you have exciting and unusual hobbies in these areas:
Women also want to experience adventure and are looking for a partner with whom they can break out of the dreary daily grind! And as soon as you have this exciting life, any woman will desire nothing more but to be a part of it.
9. Talk to her
Ridiculous as it may seem, a lot of men fail in the dating scene primarily because they are afraid to approach an attractive woman and talk to her.
You have to stop putting attractive women on a pedestal and understand that no matter how beautiful a woman is, she is still human and has her share of strengths and weaknesses.
When you do find the courage to approach a woman, don’t get hide behind cheeky pick-up lines. Just give her a friendly smile, say hello, and introduce yourself for starters.
10. Listen to her
Once you’ve got a conversation going with a woman, be sure to make it more about her than you. Encourage her to talk about her hobbies, her family, her work, or anything she wants to talk about. More importantly, LISTEN to what she says.
Women appreciate having a man who’s really interested in them as a person rather than merely a sexual partner. Show her that you’re listening by asking her to elaborate on some points or by referring to something she said earlier when YOU try to make a point.
11. Make her laugh
Photo by Vinicius Wiesehofer fron Unsplash
Women of all ages always appreciate men who know how to look at the lighter side of things. This is why a good sense of humor is one of the best tools on how to make a girl like you.
Once you’ve learned how to tickle a woman’s funny bone, you’re already halfway towards getting her to like you in a romantic sense. If you don’t already have it, an effective way to develop a good sense of humor is by taking at least an hour each day to watch your favorite comedians or funny sitcoms.
Pretty soon, you’ll be able to deliver punch lines as naturally as those comedians do. But, the most important thing is for you to relax in the company of the woman you like so that the laughter can come naturally to both of you.
12. Compliment her properly
Now, you probably didn’t know that there’s a right and wrong way of complimenting a girl, did you? Well, there is and you’ll have to learn how to give compliments to a woman if you really want to learn how to make her like you.
You may already be aware that women like being complimented on their looks, but what you may not know is that they don’t really appreciate receiving compliments on those parts of their looks which they don’t have control over.
For example, when you compliment her on how lovely her eyes are, it doesn’t make as much impact as when you compliment her on how her scarf brings out the beauty of her eyes. What’s the difference? Well, she got her eyes through genetics, but choosing the perfect accessory to accentuate her eyes is something she actually worked at.
So, when you compliment her on the scarf, you are actually acknowledging her efforts and telling her that they definitely paid off.
13. Learn how to flirt subtly
Of course, women love flirting as much as men do; they just don’t like being too obvious about it. So, when you flirt with a woman, make it subtle. Brush your hand slightly with hers as you make a seemingly careless gesture, or use the power of your smile.
In the course of your conversation, look at her directly and give her a slow, slightly mischievous smile from time to time. Be careful not to overdo it, though, or you’ll end up looking really ridiculous.
14. Make physical contact
Don’t be afraid to touch a woman; there are a lot of ways to do so without being sleazy. You can lightly put your hand on her arm as you both laugh at something. You can tuck her hair behind her ears or brush it away from her face.
If you are in a venue where dancing is encouraged, then you’ve got the perfect excuse to initiate physical contact and bring the attraction to the next level. Ask her to dance and look deep into her eyes while you’re dancing.
15. Don’t be desperate or needy
Your goal is to become more attractive to women and being desperate is NOT the way to do that. Women are repulsed by desperate men and do everything to avoid them.
If you feel that your first meeting went really well and you were able to get her number, it’s okay to give her a call, but NOT as a first thing the morning after! Wait a day or two before making that call and if possible, don’t ask her for a date on that first phone call.
You have to send her a message telling her that it was wonderful to have met her and you would like her to develop a deeper relationship with you, but at the same time let her know that you have a life outside of that relationship.
16. Acquire a strong sense of self
This is probably the most important advice you can get when learning how to make a girl like you. In fact, it is very difficult to do everything else that was discussed in this article unless you are confident and happy with who you are as a person.
Regardless of whether you are getting to know each other or in a relationship, hardly anything makes men as attractive as an unshakable self-confidence that is hard as steel. It is THE key to success with the opposite sex.
Exuding confidence tells a woman that you are always in control of the situation and that you are more than capable of taking care of her. Besides, how can you expect a woman to like you if you’re not even sure whether you like yourself? Being confident, therefore, is the first step towards becoming more attractive to the opposite sex.
Keep in mind that acquiring strong confidence doesn’t mean that you should mutate into a macho or an asshole. You should simply know your values and be courageous about yourself and your goals, i.e. treat yourself as well as your best friend.
For your behavior this means specifically:
- Being able to speak to attractive women confidently at any time, whether in the club, at work, or in your free time
- Being able to keep eye contact while flirting instead of shyly looking away
- Don’t let their rejections irritate you, just smile friendly and move on
- Do not take rejections personally, but hold on to your self-esteem
- Staying stubbornly on the ball, even if it gives you a rejection (playfully)
- Don’t hand her drinks and give her expensive gifts just to make her like you (because it’s a sign of low self-esteem and a weak personality!)
- Dare to ask her out on a date in time
- Take the lead as a (dominant) alpha male and tell her where to go
- Give the woman the feeling of security and radiate protective instinct so that she feels safe with you
Don’t chase after her and bombard her with WhatsApp messages, but make yourself rare to play with closeness and distance
- Don’t be too shy, flirt aggressively, and show her when you meet her that you are into her (instead of just playing the “nice buddy” and then wondering why she puts you in the friend zone too…)
- Stand by your opinion instead of speaking by mouth just to please her
- Have your own goals and missions in life and pursue them, no matter what other people think of them
- Draw clear boundaries, be able to say a bold “NO” and put your own needs first instead of helping her with all the little things like a butler
- Flirting aggressively with touch and trying to kiss her on the date
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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